Lisa Bonnema

Mom. Writer. Speaker.

Archives for August 2006

12 Months

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Our Sweet Little Emma,

Happy 1st Brithday! How do I begin to put into words what this last year has meant to your Daddy and me? We have felt emotions so deep we never knew they existed until you came along…

A LOVE so pure and strong that a simple glance at your precious face makes our hearts warm and ache at the same time. We wish so much for you, yet we want so badly to hold you in our arms and freeze time so we can always fit your tiny hands safely in ours. We love you enough to let you explore on your own, even if it means you will probably get a few bumps and bruises along the way. But we will always be there to comfort you—to kiss your owies, to wipe away the tears, to shush away the cries.

A JOY we haven’t felt since we were children ourselves. We look at flowers and trains and puppy dogs through your eyes, and we see the beauty and wonder of everything God created for us. Your curiosity teaches us to admire every little detail—the peaceful look on an elderly woman’s face that makes you smile or the touch of sand on your feet that makes you want to kick and dance and roll around. The simple breeze running through your hair that makes you scrunch up your nose and giggle. All things we take for granted; yet you teach us to stop and notice. To stop and enjoy.

A WORRY that never seems to go away. Since the day we knew you were growing inside of me, we were afraid of what might happen. A loss of control that required a whole lot of faith in God, a lesson we are constantly learning. Whether it was your cries of pain at night or your uncomfortable wiggles throughout the day, we prayed and cried and trusted. We had to. As much as we want to believe we can protect you, there is only so much we can do. In the end, you are in His hands. And trust me, with your determined spirit, we will be keeping that promise in our pockets for many, many years to come.

A PRIDE that wells up in our eyes and practically bursts out of our ears. Your first smile at 6 weeks. Your first word at 7 months. Your first step at 10 months. Giant leaps that overwhelm us with feelings of satisfaction that our own accomplishments could never provide. Watching you move from our arms to the floor to your feet all happened way too fast, but we are so proud of your sense of adventure that we wouldn’t change any of it for the world. We eagerly anticipate your next developments, but we remind ourselves to treasure the joys of today. We have found that time has a way of stealing away moments before we realize they are gone.

We watch in total AWE as you discover all that life has to offer: You thoughtfully page through your books, talking to the pictures in your own little language. You carry your doggie and baby around with you, stopping to kiss them every once in a while to let them know how much you love them. You listen when I ask you to sit while we have a snack, even though you are sooooo very hungry. You snuggle with your blankie and binkie, your two most favorite things in the world that put you to sleep in an instant. You giggle at our silly jokes, love to chase us around, and even enjoy wrestling with us. You quietly ride in your car seat as we drive from here to there, looking out the window, soaking it all in. You are always in motion, but always make time for a quick kiss or cuddle, instants we’ve learned to savor so that we always remember.

A sense of true CONTENTMENT. We now feel complete in a way we never knew was possible. Of course, that’s because we never had a child, or all that comes along with that blessing. You have made life more complicated, yes, but also more fulfilling than anything this world can give.

It is no coincidence that we called you Heaven Sent from the beginning. God has truly revealed himself to us through you. Your eyes show an innocence He always intended for us. Your heart overflows with a love and trust that teach us how we should live every day.

We now understand how hard it is to love from afar, but realize that it is necessary so that you can become the unique person God created.

Yes, Emma, because of you, we know unconditional love in its purest form; a glimpse of how much God loves us. Unfathomable love in just 12 short months.

What a wonderful gift the next few years will be as God reveals more and more to us. But for now, we thank Him for the last year. That is more than enough.

All our love,
Mommy and Daddy

Check us out!

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Yes, I found me some Wi-Fi on vacation, but I won’t be a total geek and spend too much time on the Mac instead of in the sun. STILL, I wanted you guys to check us out on Urban Baby Runway. I wrote the review, Emma styled the shirt! Click here to see for yourself!

Trusting our Gut

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So we got the allergy tests back and of course they are all negative. I know we should be all elated and stuff, but I can honestly say I feel no different than I did before we did the testing. I know that RAST tests are rarely accurate, especially when performing them on a child Emma’s age. Still, we did them just in case (and because our doctor suggested it).

Does this convince me she’s not allergic to anything? Nope. I don’t care if I sound like a Hypochondriac or not — I KNOW her tummy does not like certain foods and for that reason, we’re going to steer clear of a few things. Milk, eggs and peanuts will have to wait for now, and we’re avoiding acidic, citrus fruits because they seem to irritate her acid reflux. I’m also skipping the chocolate on her birthday. That was one thing she definitely couldn’t tolerate when I was nursing, and I don’t want her to suffer on her big day.

HOWEVER, we are moving forward with meats and other veggies. I’m also going to continue to slowly introduce foods into her diet, but not the 7-day procedure we used before. I’ll probably do more like 3 days, just to make sure.

I have to admit that Jeff and I were a little hesitant to tell everyone about the test results because it’s amazing how many people think they know the answer to Emma’s issues when they really have no idea what we’ve gone through. Trust me, we’ve thought of and tried everything. I know people are just trying to help, but how come they always end up making us feel like we’re overreacting? Maybe it’s our own insecurity as parents… I don’t know.

Anyway, thanks to my new blogging friend Lori , I was encouraged to share with ya’ll and stand firm on what my instincts are telling me. After all, that’s how we found Emma’s thrush and reflux and eventually, her milk intolerance/allergy. It was hard being a first-time mom and convincing people “something wasn’t right,” but in the end, the best decision was trusting my gut.

That doesn’t mean I don’t believe Emma will grow out of all of this. And, sure, maybe the RAST test indicates that. But there’s no reason why we need to rush into anything if Jeff and I aren’t comfortable yet. We may get brave and try soy yogurt in a few weeks, but for now, I want to get some meat (protein) in her.

Was that a rant or what? Let’s make this a bit lighter with some photos. I’m going to post quite a few so a few family members can get what they call their “Emma fix” while we’re gone a vacation this coming week. Hopefully this holds ya’ll over!!!


Cheese!
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Sooooo Big!
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MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMAH!
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Lovin’ her “dady”…
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Yeah for me!
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Mix it up DJ Emma!
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A Day in the Life…

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Over the last 11 months, this blog has kinda turned into Emma’s baby book. Yes, I plan to fill out her actual baby book one of these days, but for now, this works really well and forces me to stay up-to-date.

As my peanut nears the 1-year mark (sniff, sniff), I wanted to get a few logistical items in here before I write her letter, which I want to be more poetic than informational. I’ll try to stay away from too many bullet points so I don’t bore you to death, but I also want Emma to know as much detail as possible.

One of the hardest things for me to figure out the first few months of Emma’s life was the whole “schedule” thing. I tried to find a happy medium between my anal retentive self and throwing caution to the wind, but Emma wasn’t really adjusting to my “plan” so well. That meant many frustrated meltdowns and calls to my mom, but also many lessons learned. Everyone kept telling me, “Read your baby, Lisa. Forget the books.” Yes, yes, I know, but how the heck am I supposed to know what she is saying? It’s not like she’s talking people!

But as the days and weeks turned into months, I started to get it and POW! We arrived at a schedule. It was so great. I was in heaven… for a week, until the next “schedule” kicked in. Always keeping me on my toes, Emma knew exactly when my mommy ego was getting a bit too big and quickly put me in my place with a minor change here and there. Eventually, I got used to that too and was excited to see how she was developing in everything from sleep habits (thank God!!) to eating.

Right now, I have to say we have a pretty good thing going. I try not to be a hyper scheduler, but honestly, Emma responds to schedules really well and seems to be happier when we are organized.

So here is a normal day in the life of Emma (at least for now):

6am: Wakes up in her crib, chatting to herself and her stuffed animals until she finally lets out a “num num” for her bottle. Sometimes I can get her to cuddle in bed with me for a few minutes, but not for very long.

6:30am: First dose of Prevacid (1 oz) and a 6-oz bottle

8:00am: Breakfast time! Some organic oatmeal and fruit (either chunks of banana or a jar of pears). If she’s still hungry, some Cheerios.

8:45am: Morning nap (usually 1hr and 15 min, although once in a while it’s only 45 min)

10:00am: Wake up chatting again and greets me with a huge grin.

11:30am: Lunch time! Some veggies (either a jar of squash, sweet potatoes, peas & rice or grn beans & rice -or- the same foods cooked and cut up), some carbs (pieces of whole wheat bread or organic pasta), and a 5- or 6-oz bottle, depending on how hungry she is. Once in a while she gets some fruit too, but I usually save that for dinner.

12:45pm: Afternoon nap (usually about 2 hrs)

3:00pm: Snack (watered down pear juice and some Gerber sweet potato veggie puffs or Cheerios)

4:30pm: Second dose of Prevacid

5:00pm: Dinner time! Same as lunch, but usually a fruit too. We save the bottle for a little later.

6:00pm: 7-oz bottle

6:30pm: bath time, books and singing

7:00pm: bed time